POST YOUR JOKES HERE

[Joka X]

i think it is posted before......also by me.....

[Exploited]

niiice

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Why the beer is better than the women:

1. The beer never cries "sorry my head hurts"
2. You can take a couple of beers for a single night
3. You are always sure that you are the first one who opens the beer
4. You never buy flowers to your beer
5. Multiple beers on a table do not talk no-senses
6. You can share a beer with friends
7. Beer is cheaper
8. Beer do not have a mother
9. You can return empty beer botles
10. Cold beer is good
11. Beer always waits you patiently and never complain about "you are late"

[farkzlay]

hahaha
but you can not having sex with a beer, do you?

[NiKSY]

hahaha
but you can not having sex with a beer, do you?

I DONT WANNA KNOW :-|

[Exploited]

yeah better don't wanna know if somebody can

Three fathers talking:
- I found a pack of cigarretes in the closet of my daugther... I didn't know she is a smoker
- Poor you but guess what - I found a needle in the closet of my daughter... I didn't know she is a junkie
- Lucky you two - I found a condom in the closet of my daughter... I didn't know she is a boy

[keaglez]

LOL...

[Jithin]

This is a good one..

A man wound up ship wrecked on a deserted island. The only survivors of the wreck (besides himself) was a sheep dog and a sheep.

After the days passed into months he began to look at the sheep with interest. He had heard that sex with sheep was good and since he had become so lonely he was starting to wonder about it.

So he decided that he would have a go at the ole sheep. The problem was that no matter how hard he tried that sheep dog would just about eat him up every time he got near that sheep. Day after day he plotted and schemed, but he was unable to get to the sheep.

One day, while he was sitting up against a tree looking and longing at the sheep he happened to look down toward the beach and notice wreckage washing ashore. Then he noticed a body laying in the water near the shore. He got up and headed down and as he got closer he thought it looked like a woman. "A woman!" he thought, "I hope she is still alive!"

He ran all the way to where she was laying and found that she was still alive. He pulled her out of the water and lifted her up into his arms and looked at her there. She was nearly naked and soaking wet.

She said "Oh sir! You have saved my life! How can I ever repay you! I will give you anything you want!"

He grinned and as he looked down at her he said "Anything?" She nodded.

He held her close and they walked up the hill and he took her behind some bushes. He held her close to him and whispered in her ear "You see that dog over there? Hold that son of a bitch down so I can get at that sheep"

Mwaaa haa haaa haaa

[Exploited]

LOL LOL LOL

The new priest gives advises to the noobie:
- Ok dear friend now try to cross hands in front of your chest and listen the confession  with patience
The new priest do that... After a little while:
- Now friend please try to tell the guy "yes I understand", "please go on" and "how do you feel?"
The new priest do that... At the end of the confession the old priest ask him:
- Now how do you feel boy? Don't you think it's much better that way instead of slapping your knees and shouting "No way! Are you serious? MUHAHAHAHA"

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Japan doctor: Our medicine is so great that we can transplant a kidney from one patient to another and he will be up searching for a job in four weeks.

The French doctor: That's nothing. We can transplant half a heart from one patient to another and both patients will be up searching for a job in two weeks.

The American doctor: You are way way back. We got a man without brain from Texas, put him in the Whitehouse and after just one week half of the American nation was searching for a job...

[farkzlay]

politics jokes is always funny LOL

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The bus is full of kinds going back to home from school. A very fat man enters inside and starts shouting:

- Please step aside for the old man with the aquarium!

One kid jumps from his seat and the fat guy sits. The kid asks:

- But mister, where is your aquarium?

The fat guy starts to fondle his round belly and says:

- 500 grams of sprat fish and 5 beers!

[Jithin]

A Jamaican man wants a job, but the foreman won’t hire him until he passes a little math test.
Here is your first question, the foreman Said.
“Without using numbers, represent the number 9.”
“Without numbers?” The Jamaican says, “Dat is easy.”
And proceeds to draw three trees.

“What’s this?” the boss asks
“Ave you got no brain? Tree and tree and tree make nine,” says the Jamaican.
“Fair enough,” says the boss. “Here’s your second question. Use the same rules, but this time the number is 99.”

The Jamaican stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree.
“Ere you go.”

The boss scratches his head and says, “How on earth do you get that to represent 99?”

“Each of da trees is dirty now. So, it’s dirty tree, and dirty tree, and dirty tree. Dat is 99.”

The boss is getting worried that he’s going to actually have to hire this Jamaican,
so he says, “All right, last question.

Same rules again, but represent the number 100.”

The Jamaican stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, “Ere you go. One hundred.”

The boss looks at the attempt. “You must be nuts if you think that represents a hundred!”

The Jamaican leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and says, “A little dog come along and crap by each tree.

So now you got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and a turd, which makes one hundred.”

“SO, WHEN I START?”

[Exploited]

hahahah

One crutch talking to another:
- Man, something between us limps...

[ahmed]

There was a wise man called Goha visited his friend at chickens farm
his friend wanted to laugh at Goha and asked him (can u goha count how many chickens present in this farm in 3 minutes)?! of course Goha said..after one minute Goha answered  (3417 checken)!!! his friend got crazy and asked him ( right..how did you know that)?! (i counted their legs and divided it by two)!! Goha answered...!!