Pernik Tuning Tutorial (or how to increase the horse power of your Golf II):
1. You get 120 HP with regular Golf II GTI. Go get it!
2) Sign "GTI" at the front gives you 5 HP, one at the back gives 15 (other people always look at your back!)... => we have 140 HP here...
3) Darkened windows + 10 HP
4) Two additional fog lights on the front + 10 HP
5) Big end of the exhausing pipe... oh man, that's serios - 25 HP! => Total here we have 185
6) Big sticker with sign REMUS on the back window... I give here at least 25!
7) Custom 16V sign sticker will give you around 15 HP => 225 total on 7)
Little, but VISIBLE (?!?) spoiler on the boot will help you to higher the air pressure and lower the fuel leaks - that's about 25 donkey powers or you have total of 250 HP!
9) Mould wheel rim (imitation of O.Z.) 20 EURO pair gives 20 (5HP per rim) so total 270!
10) Any tuning company sticker gives 2 HP, eg every Pernik "Golfer" have minimum 10 firms (different) we end up with 290 HP average
11) Only 1 HP, but really cool feature is to have few red diodes hidden in the muff of the exhausing pipe. It will look like that the Golf makes the pipes red!
12) If your car number starts with PK, KH or at least BH you will get 15, 10 or 5 respectfully; however only the PK can double his HP when he drives in Sofia! If he drives in his home town - the HP are falling down twice (sad).
13) Very very important is to look "gangster bad" and to use the horn a lot. This gives you about 30 HP!
14) Open driver window, left hand handles the steering wheel high with elbow out of the window, right hand on the gear level (squeeze at least three times harder than the wheel!), head down the way that the eyes are at the level of the elbow (because you will look more scary that way), Nokia 3310 on the belt and a hardcore pop-folk music from the new audio system! It looks hard to do, but when you get used to it - 10 HP for you (it deserves more, but too many people are already using that). Now our dream Golf II will be over 300 HP !!!
13) Blue lights on the wind-screen wiper gives 7-8 mule on your car (night time only!).
14) Every real supercar Golf II owner can:
- Outrun from the right side - 3 bonus points.
- Drive with at least 40Km/h over the limits in non-English speaking countries - 4 bonus points.
The idea is that they can exchange their bonus points for horse power in special Golf II supercar shops. Those shops are popular in Bulgaria as: "Golf-2 accessories - everything 1 or 2 EURO". They give stickes type "dirty spot", "crack", "playboy" and others.
15) Doggy, cat, elephant or at least a CD on the front window are a big HP bonus for a Pernik (PK) golfer! Sometimes it's hard to see the road using those junks, but that's exactly why the Pernik car masters are the best! For every self-respectful Pernik driver it's obligatory to have a tufted rug on the back seat (it's hard to see that from the darkened windows). Now finally if you also have a box of eggs there - you deserve your 5HP!
16) Printed note, sicked from the inside of one of the windows (or doubled from the two sides) which says: "FOR SALE! 10 000 LEVS!" gives you 10 HP. If it's EU style: "FOR SALE! 5000 EURO!" you get 15!
You will never sale such precious car, but it's important for the other people to know it's price!
Where are we? Did you calculated your maximum? Your golf is the most powerful car in the world now!
Original source:
http://ipernik.blogspot.com/2007/11/blog-post_8478.html
